Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Opening the vent

OK, one of my big weaknesses is a quick temper, and one thing that gets my goat as much as anything is bad or careless or aggressive drivers. I spend about 2.5 hours on the road every week day, so I see quite a lot of this. You can help make my day better by taking a week of from work and passing this around to everybody you can get your hands on, OK? Of course they'll all gladly follow your suggestion (guffaw, guffaw!).

So, please allow me to vent about of those things that really bug me. If you do any of these, please stop. And if you see anybody else does it, write the link to this site on a piece of paper and show it to the offending driver. Soon, I'll be happy (oh, and you will too!). Also, let me know some of the things that have led you close to road rage.

By the way, I have committed some of these offenses (gasp!), so I'm yelling at myself as well. I mean, we all screw up sometimes, but if you are doing any of these things because you think you have some special right to, then may the next flung booger land on your windshield.

  • Staying in the left lane
  • Keeping your blinker on
  • Turning or changing lanes (especially with a car directly behind) without a blinker
  • Weaving in and out of lanes
  • Not yielding right of way on an onramp with two entrances. The person entering on the right has the right of way, unless there is a sign saying otherwise.
  • Motorcycles that drive between lanes. My understanding of the NJ motor vehicle laws say this is not legal, and is certainly dangerous.
  • Driving with no lights on in the dark (that includes rainy and foggy weather).
  • Clearing a tiny space in the windshield to see through the snow or ice on your car.
  • Driving with several inches of snow or ice on your vehicle. What if in the process of warming and cooling it turns to ice? Huh? HUH?! (oops, sorry about that).
  • Not responding when I flash my lights telling you it's OK to merge into traffic in front of me.
  • Merging into traffic in front of me when I have not given the OK. I will usually allow you to go when it's safe, but it's always my prerogative (police, etc. excepted).
  • Even worse is when you cut right in front of me, though no cars are in sight behind me, and then you go 20 mph under the speed limit.
  • Sub-woofers.
  • Driving in the snow/ice as fast as you would drive in normal weather
  • Not allowing drivers to merge into heavy traffic ("I've just gotta gain that extra 10 feet of space!")
  • Tailgaters
  • Driving with perpetual high beams
  • Not respecting crosswalks
  • Rubbernecking (all right, you can slow down if there's an accident or a police stoppage on your side of the road, but if it's on a divided highway and the situation is on the other side of the road, pull over to the shoulder, get out a camera, and film away. Or, if it's goriness you want, I'm sure you can rent a DVD with that kind of stuff)
  • Not stopping at stop signs or before making a right on red
  • Blocking driveways that clearly say, "Do not block driveway."
  • Passing on double yellow line
  • Throwing garbage and cigarette butts out the window
  • Honking in dead-stopped traffic (what's the guy in front of you going to do?)
  • Cutting across multiple lanes of traffic to get to an exit ramp
  • Bypassing the long line of cars in the exit only lane, and then trying to cut in at the last minute.
  • Outdated campaign stickers (c'mon, you know you hate it too)
  • Parking in two spaces (yes, with one car!)
  • Not accelerating to highway speed on the onramp.
  • Not stopping for school buses picking up children
  • Putting your brakes on every few seconds while driving down a perfectly clear, straight road.
  • Changing into the lane I'm in, directly in front of me, even though there is nobody in front of you in your lane, and even though I'm going about 20 mph faster than you, requiring me to swerve into the open lane or slam on my brakes to avoid a collision.

Ah, now I feel so much better (until a week from now when I realize that nobody took my excellent advice--sigh!).


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